COMIC RELIEF: Puff the Magic Dragon
by Silver Ice
Summary: Why is Hagrid pacing the grounds outside? Will Harry help Hagrid with his problem? How does Buckbeak get involved with this? rrf


A/N: I warn ye now fair reader who havt stumbled unto this here story. Tis a frightful tale and I would not recommend it to ye weak of heart. Ye shall look on through to the fearsome world of Puff and his horrors. If ye shall continue, then I set ye me thanks...now....precede to the frightful tale of....

  


Puff the Magic Dragon

By: Silver Ice

  


_(Chorus)  
Puff, the magic dragon lived by the sea  
And frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called Honah Lee  
  
Little Jackie Paper loved that rascal Puff,  
and brought him strings and sealing wax and other fancy stuff. Oh!  
  
(Chorus, twice)  
  
Together they would travel on a boat with billowed sail  
Jackie kept a lookout perched on Puff's gigantic tail,  
Noble kings and princes would bow whene'er they came,  
Pirate ships would lower their flag when Puff roared out his name. Oh!  
  
(Chorus)  
  
A dragon lives forever but not so little boys  
Painted wings and giant rings make way for other toys.  
One grey night it happened, Jackie Paper came no more  
And Puff that mighty dragon, he ceased his fearless roar.  
  
His head was bent in sorrow, green scales fell like rain,  
Puff no longer went to play along the cherry lane.  
Without his life-long friend, Puff could not be brave,  
So Puff that mighty dragon sadly slipped into his cave. Oh!  
  
(Chorus, softly)  
(Chorus, loudly)_  


It was a bright early morning, late in the month of October. The sun rose just as Harry pulled himself out of bed. He couldn't sleep, and he didn't feel like doing anything for two hours. So, Harry pulled on a robe, and exited the boys dormitory where Neville snored loudly and everyone else slept snugly. When in the common room Harry sat by the fire to warm himself. He would have liked to sit there until the first Gryffindor came bounding down the stairs, but Harry felt something wasn't right. He rose and went to the window. Peering through the glass, he saw below him Hagrid's small hut. Hagrid himself was pacing frantically in front of it, and Harry decided to see what was wrong. He ran through the empty halls and opened the doors in the entrance hall. A gust of wind caused Harry to shiver, but he payed no mind and continued his run to Hagrid. Hagrid looked up from his pacing when he heard someone approaching, and saw Harry drawing near. Hagrid sighed in relief.

"Hallo Harry!" Hagrid hollered with a wave.

"Morning Hagrid. I saw you pacing, is something wrong?" Harry asked, curiosity overtaking politeness.

"Actually Harry, there's been an awful happening," Hagrid said, knowing Harry would solve the problem.

"Well, what is it then Hagrid? Has Voldemort returned?" Harry asked.

"Oh no, nothing like that! It's worse. You see Harry...Puff has escaped from Azkaban," Hagrid replied, looking grave.

"P-Puff?" Harry asked with a gulp.

"Yes Harry, Puff." Hagrid repeated.

"This can't be! Goodness, why? How could this have happened!" Harry said frantically. 

"The dementors were lulled to sleep when Puff's song came on!" Hagrid said with a sharp sigh. He began to pace once again.

"Not _his_ song! Oh those poor soul-sucking dementors! Even they don't deserve such cruelties! We have to do something Hagrid, Puff has to be captured." Harry said, raising his head nobly.

"Thank you Harry! I knew you would do what has to be done! We must save the world before Puff works his magic and destroys the wizarding world as we know it!" Hagrid exclaimed.

"Well then, I'll be off on my journey now. I know just where to find _him_." Harry said with a salute.

"Oh!" Hagrid shouted as Harry marched to the entrance gates and exited through them. Harry shuddered at the thought of Puff being out...lose in the world! Puff was indeed far worse than Voldemort. Puff was sneaky, conniving, and fluffy. It was a lethal combination that had brought thousands of wizards into St. Mungo's. Puff hadn't really been much of a threat until..._his song_. Indeed, it was that song that had started to make people disappear. That piercing melody...the curiously enticing lyrics. Wizards and witches alike had fallen into the hold of the soft melody, and once deprived of the melody, they simply ceased to exist. It was like a permanent invisibility cloak had been draped over them. Philosophers hadn't found a way to 'un-cloak' these people...but now Harry felt as though he could do it.

As Harry began his journey he hummed the melody of Willie Nelson's 'On the Road Again' and smiled in determination. The smile Harry has started with was gone about a mile outside of Hogwarts. He was quite tired of walking and so shouted loudly.

"TEA!" A moment latter Buckbeak landed besides him.

"Tea?" Buckbeak questioned thirstily.

"No, but I can get you some if you fly me some where," Harry replied

"Jump on me," Buckbeak said. So Harry hopped on to Buckbeak and they were off, and almost to their destination.

Buckbeak flew Harry over several towns that were filled with twinkling lights, but soon enough they were flying over beaches. Harry gazed at the caves that occasionally came into view before shouting, "STOP" at the 13th cave.

Buckbeak halted and flew down to land roughly on the ground.

"Tea," Buckbeak said.

"Teteatericoris," Harry mumbled, and a pool of tea appeared before Buckbeak.

"Tea!" Buckbeak said again, before drinking eagerly from the pool. 

Harry sighed in confusion before heading towards the small cave. He approached the door to see a sign that read

GO OVER THERE AND DIE

Harry couldn't help but shiver as he knocked cautiously at the door.

"Go away!" Puff hollered loudly.

Harry wouldn't give up though, "No way, you open this door, I have a hippogriff and I'm not afraid to use him!"

There was a shuffling inside the cave before the door creaked open. Harry pushed it open the rest of the way and saw Puff sitting besides the fire.

"Who, are _you_?" Puff asked, his voice filled with dislike. 

"Harry. Harry Potter. I know who you are," Harry replied with a glare. 

"Well then Harry Potter, you're about to die!" Puff exclaimed evilly.

"Wait! Before you kill me, just know, Lord Voldemort is holding Jackie Paper hostage!" Harry exclaimed.

Puff, who had had his claw poised over the 'play' button on his radio, turned around sharply.

"J-Jackie?" Puff asked, sounding like a forlorn child. 

"Yup," Harry answered. Puff smiled before jumping up suddenly in a rage. 

"I'm gonna kill Voldie!" Puff shouted.

"Yay!" Harry yelled, as he watched Puff run out the door and fly into the night. 

He waited only a moment before running to the radio that Puff had stood by moments ago. Harry opened the small box and took out the CD that was labeled "My Baby". 

Harry dropped the CD to the floor and stomped on it in wildly. Rather than shattering it began to glow brightly, and a moment later there was a series of what seemed like billions of 'pops'. Harry had been alone in the cave, but now he was smashed against a wall. The cave was suddenly filled with at least a hundred people. 

It was silent for a moment before someone screeched, "We're free!" There was a sudden cheering and everyone ran out of the cave or apperated away. Harry stood in confusion as he again found himself in an empty cave only a few moments later. He stood quietly for a while before Buckbeak walked quickly into the cave.

He looked at Harry before saying, "Tea."

Harry sighed, glad that the day was done, and the world was saved...or at least for a while.

A/N: *blushes madly* Ouch...this hurt my brain to read! Tell me, is this as ridiculous as I think it is? *flinches as everyone screams YES* Well...you may want to read 'Tea' now...I'm telling you, that one is good, really, I think you'd enjoy it. 

Well, review...please?

Disclaimer: Puff not mine, Harry Potter and co. not mine, Puff's song not mine...darn.


End file.
